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Luigikuik

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Everything posted by Luigikuik

  1. First article is up. Daring protesters speak up against their employer.
  2. Truckers on strike ''I'd rather work for Amazon than drive all the way across the state for 16 dollars.'', said one of the disgruntled truckers that protested on the forth of September. Ever since there was a huge influx of migrants to Paleto Bay, a few days back, the people have been unhappy about the way of things are. Too many cars on the roads, weirdos running in the streets and now people are complaining about low wages. Some of the truckers therefore put down their work for the day to protest. The rest of the workforce didn't however and as far as we know no one actually felt anything of this strike. We asked one of the protesters what they were actually protesting about and one had this to say. ''I drive all day through the desert and I get paid nothing. I had to bring a shipment to Sandy Shores and I all got from that cross state trip was sixteen dollars and fifteen percent of that goes to the governments. It is despicable I say, it isn't right. Even after a full day of work I only get around 400 dollars. A bike for instance cost many times that. It ain't right.'', A trucker that wasn't striking said that the pay increases over time and if you only need to bring packages around town it isn't so bad. He also mentions that he can work as much as he wants and that his boss doesn't mind at what time he works. He couldn't imagine a better job for him. If this protest will change things remains to be seen. We from ttn wish them luck.
  3. Welcome to the trailer trash news website. If you are a barbecue loving, gun slinging, country protecting, beer drinking, yeehawing patriot like me, Billy Bob than this is place for you. Here we post news that is really interesting to read. So we wont post news that is boring and no one cares about. Like what happens in other countries. Darn other countries taking over our news. We will cover all the things from a national shortage of beer cans to a local cow missing in action. If you have any questions regarding my site don't be shy to send me a message. I hope you enjoy the content y'all. Who are we? We are citizens from the north of San Andreas and we are bored by how news is covered these days. We want to bring news to the people in a way that it is actually not sleep inducing. Currently the crew exist of Billy Bob and some of his friends helping him. You can find us driving around looking for things to write about. If you want to donate any beer or money to the cause it would be much obliged. We are very poor. What is our vision? As I stated before we want to bring news in a more enjoyable way. When I read news from the big companies I always fall asleep after reading the first sentence. We also only focus on local news. The way we want to achieve this is to give the articles personality of some sort. Making the article unique among articles, really justifying the existence of the articles. Either way read it or not, I don't really care. Email: [email protected] ((@luigikuik)
  4. Name: BSAAN Comment: just got out of prison for something I didn't do. Good times.
  5. Female parking From the SAAN news desk ''Does anyone have a smoke?'', asked a bystander next to the burning plane. In the evening of June the nineteenth, a large plum of smoke caught the eye of our reporter who just got out prison. He rushed to the scene without going above the speed limit. He found a plane burning to ashes on the highway next to east beach. The fire department was already extinguishing the fire and the troopers had barriers around the burning aircraft. The pilot however was not found near or inside the plane. Troopers are unsure if the person bailed out or somehow survived the crash. They are checking who owns the aircraft and use that to find the person. What is certain is that we are lucky that the plane didn't crash in any buildings and that no one got hurt. If you are wondering to what actually happened to SAAN in the meantime then you best wait for the next article. Want more SAAN? click here.
  6. "I would like to get a lawyer from the state if that is still an option.'' (( @EvilScotsman @Zebulon ))
  7. *Bruce Dewitt enters the courtroom and walks over to the defendant desk.*
  8. Generic clickbait From a SAAN representative San Andreas Action News is back for one last publishmentt. Since today is the epic Finale hosted by John Harlend and Wolfcub in an event presented by Harlend Who, Team Wolfcub and SAAN, I thought that I would release my 5 best facts about SAAN. Be sure to visit the event or else you will miss out on the only event that has ever mattered in this City. Like who doesn't want to be a millionaire. A SAAN representative will be present and has thought up ten questions for the participants. These questions will be about the company and the CEO. Check out Team Wolfcub's site if you want to know more about the event, because I have been mostly been in the dark about it. Also if you think that SAAN has been terminated then you are right. The company itself doesn't exist anymore, however Gaston is too much of a retard to stop paying for hosting of the site. Also no one changed the password of the admin account. Without any further ado five facts about SAAN that most people don't know I guess. Fact #1 San Andreas Action News is actually a Belgian Based company. Thanks to the magic of the internet we could operate in San Andreas while technically being from a small nation in Europe. This has to do with Gaston Faubert living in Belgium. Those who, for some reason, could see where the site is hosted from, would notice that SAAN.news is being hosted from Amsterdam in the Netherlands. For some reason. Fact #2 CEO Bruce Dewitt was once almost assassinated. The article about it has unfortunately been deleted by hackers in the big hack attack of 2016. It was the last article made in 2016 before Bruce quit the company. In short, he was driving his Ford Taurus SHO 2014 around while he noticed that a masked female on a motorbike following him around. He did the famous 8 turn and noticed that she was still behind him. Bruce searched for the nearest police officer and found 4 police cars parked behind a traffic violator. He parked his car next to the police car and asked for help with his stalker. The police officer told him to bug off, but before he could finish his sentence the stalker opened fire with an Uzi on Bruce sitting in his Ford Taurus SHO 2014. Bruce was unhurt but his Ford Taurus SHO 2014 was completely made into Swiss cheese. The attacker didn't survive the police onslaught. Fact #3 Several Original series were planned for SAAN but never actually got made. This include Ghetto talk, Action Fishing, Captain Dewitt and Myth Hunters. Ghetto talk was where Gaston Faubert would go to Idlewood and ask the locals questions or something. Action Fishing was a few episode series where the SAAN team would go fishing, but due to a storm, strand on a island and have to fight for a way back home against the natives. Captain Dewitt was that Bruce would take rappers out for fishing and interview them while fishing. Myth hunters started as a ghost hunting show but that would be boring very fast. I have the actual script with me and it was pretty good. It has Bigfoot, Loch Ness, Random ghost as myths but also the off duty cop and the law abiding RS Haul driver. Fact #4 San Andreas Action News used to be called Los Santos Action News and was founded on the Twenty-fifth of January 2015. Making it older than San Andreas Network. Bruce Dewitt wasn't involved with the company during this period. The around one week lifespan of this company was enough for Gaston to try again with San Andreas Action News a year later Fact #5 Bruce Dewitt was never meant to be a journalist. Bruce Dewitt was hired to be an actor for Memewatch, since he was unemployed and wasted his life with memes. Jason Schultz was the person who wanted to do news and made the SAAN template that was later edited by Bruce and everyone had to use. Bruce was later convinced by Jason to write articles as well. There was actually a documentary in the make for the complete history of SAAN but since it disbanded abruptly and without reason it was never finished. SAAN.news
  9. Name: B.Dewitt Comment: Center text reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
  10. Name: Destroyer 12 Comment: I wonder who will represent SAAN since Bruce is in prison lmao
  11. Why are we here? Just to suffer?

    1. Show previous comments  4 more
    2. croozerdog

      croozerdog

      Don't come back please no one likes u

    3. GamerX27
    4. TheNeonGuy

      TheNeonGuy

      Every night, I can feel my leg... and my arm... even my fingers. The body I've lost... the comrades I've lost... won't stop hurting... It's like they're all still there. You feel it, too, don't you @Luigikuik? I'm gonna make them give back our past!-...

  12. Name: B.Dewitt Comment: Great work as always
  13. We had a good run everyone. Special shout out to @FAILCAKEZ for being the number one fan and @DrJoseEviI for putting Bruce in Harlend Who from time to time. Also @JameZ for being the best lawyer and leaking DPS information. All the employees that worked with SAAN were also useful I guess. Now y'all can proceed to press F in the chat.
  14. The final article From Bruce Dewitt ''And now, the end is near and so I face the final curtain'', Sang Frank Sinatra in his famous song ''My way''. Today on the seventeenth of November it is exactly half a year and seven days ago since I rebooted SAAN, but to all good things must come an end. Today is the end of San Andreas Action News. I have decided to terminate the company due to personal circumstances and will be leaving Los Santos once this article is posted. When i was asked to reboot SAAN back in May I was unsure if I would do it. I got talking into it anyway and when I announced the return of SAAN I got mixed responses. But after a few articles I received enough attention and love from the readers to give me the motivation to continue. And now 73 articles later I sit here announcing my retirement. I want to thank you, my reader for sticking with me all this time. To read past my horrible grammar and my sometimes failed attempts of humor. My occasional mistakes in articles because the PD would not reveal information or I just misunderstood it. I hope that I have done the city of Los Santos a service and that people enjoyed it. Thank you for letting me do it my way. Yes it was my way.
  15. Stop breaking into my properties From the SAAN news desk ''Hope they don't drink my milk.'', said our reporter to another bystander, waiting for the swat to arrest the burglars. Burglaries have been a real plague in Los Santos for some time now. You can't find a street where none of the houses have at least some signs of break ins. Vinewood, Marina, East LS, even large companies have to deal with people destroying their cameras and picking their locks. One of our reporter had his garage. On the second of November the robbers came back for more. Our reporter drove out of his garage when he noticed his front door closing. He was confused because he didn't expect anyone to visit. A minute later the police arrived on the scene and informed our reporter that burglars had indeed trigger the alarm. They urged the burglars to surrender and face the consequences. Instead of facing their decisions like men they barricaded themselves in the property. They were armed with semi-automatic weapons for some reason. Swat arrived on the scene and tried to get them out of the building. They tried to gas them out but the burglars had gas masks with them. The swat charged into the building with an armored car and a shootout occurred. The burglars fired at the swat and the swat fired back. The burglars somehow found the time to eat all the frozen chicken in the freezer before throwing milk bottles at the officers. After two and a half hours and more than 500 bullet holes later, the burglars got neutralized and only one of the swat was badly injured. The reason why the burglars took gas masks and semi-automatic weapons to a simple burglary is a mystery. Why they rather faced certain death than being trialed for breaking and entering is also unknown. Want more SAAN? click here. http://saan.news
  16. Bombing in Los Santos From the SAAN news desk ''What the fuck happened?!'', shouted a bystander after hearing gunshots and explosions. On the thirtieth of October our reporter stopped at a scene where officer Justin Stars was arresting a person. Since almost nothing has happened the past few days he decided to stick around. Suddenly two men dressed as Batman showed up and started shooting at officer Stars and the people near him. Two of the people near officer Stars were FBI agents and returned fire at the attackers. One of the batmen took out a grenade and threw it at officer Stars who was already shot a few times. The blast killed officer Stars and one of the attackers at the spot. Tnree bystanders got injured with one in a critical condition. The other police officers arrived in a record time and chased after one of the attackers that ran after the blast. He did not go very far before getting turned into Swiss Cheese. A lot of people were panicking and more and more officers showed up. Multiple ambulances arrived on the scene to help the wounded. The police car was completely destroyed by the grenade. Luckily with the police's quick reaction none of the attackers could get away. The motive of the attackers is unknown and some speculate that they were terrorists trying to take down police officers. Want more SAAN? click here saan.news
  17. Anti rice protest From the SAAN news desk ''Ricers are donkeys, remember that.'', said a man actively trying to get rid people he saw as ricers. On the twenty-second of October our reporter almost got ran over by a man who was driving a box van. He parked his van right in front of the Pizza Stack building even though multiple people were standing there. He stated that he had to do a delivery, however the people were furious about almost being ran over. He left Stacks after a while to trap a modded car in the pay and spray with his van. He told our reporter that ricers hurt us and our kids, therefor someone had to stop the ricers. The man trapped inside the pay and spray demanded to be let go and the box van guy would release him if he payed ten dollars. A police officer showed up and resolved the issue for the moment by ordering the guy to move his box van, to which he did. Soon after the officer left he returned to the entrance of the pay and spray and stood there alone, once again blocking the entrance. A larger crowd now wanted him gone and tried to reason with him. He kept shouting that ricers had to go since they hurt people. The same officer returned and was now a bit frustrated. She gave the man one last warning to stop blocking the way for everyone or else he would be arrested. The man left the scene and returned when the police officer left. He now placed a chair in front of the entrance and sat down. The officer returned and was disappointed in the man that didn't learn his lesson. She arrested him and his chair was lynched by an angry mob. Want more saan? click here. saan.news
  18. Briefcase 6 is ready From the SAAN briefcase desk Well the special 20k worth briefcase had been found by someone right before I was going to post a second hint. The briefcase was located in Verona Mall since all the briefcases originate from there. Some people thought it was in Grove for some reason and someone asked me if it was behind the SAAN HQ since that would mean it was home for SAAN. Anyway the sixth briefcase has already been hidden by the special briefcase department of SAAN. The hint for this one is, eat fresh. Take a picture of you and the briefcase on the spot where you found it. Send it to [email protected] ((forum PM)). Get invited to the SAAN HQ to collect your 10 grand. Good luck everyone!
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