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Everything posted by Luigikuik

  1. Luigikuik

    [SAAN] The final article

    The final article From Bruce Dewitt ''And now, the end is near and so I face the final curtain'', Sang Frank Sinatra in his famous song ''My way''. Today on the seventeenth of November it is exactly half a year and seven days ago since I rebooted SAAN, but to all good things must come an end. Today is the end of San Andreas Action News. I have decided to terminate the company due to personal circumstances and will be leaving Los Santos once this article is posted. When i was asked to reboot SAAN back in May I was unsure if I would do it. I got talking into it anyway and when I announced the return of SAAN I got mixed responses. But after a few articles I received enough attention and love from the readers to give me the motivation to continue. And now 73 articles later I sit here announcing my retirement. I want to thank you, my reader for sticking with me all this time. To read past my horrible grammar and my sometimes failed attempts of humor. My occasional mistakes in articles because the PD would not reveal information or I just misunderstood it. I hope that I have done the city of Los Santos a service and that people enjoyed it. Thank you for letting me do it my way. Yes it was my way.
  2. Luigikuik

    i miss my old forum account - rip piercee

    Wesleycool is best fmt member
  3. Luigikuik

    San Andreas Action news

    ABOUT US Welcome everyone to the San Andreas Action News site. Some of the older lads may remember SAAN from back in the day with hit articles such as: ''Welcome to the rice fields'' and ''Barbarians at the gate''. This was all in 2016 or something and that all doesn't really matter now. Anyway SAAN is back in town all new and improved. I know what you are thinking,''How is SAAN different from all the other news companies that are operating in Los Santos?''. Well dear reader that is simple. SAAN strives to bring eyewitness news as fast as possible, so that it stays relevant. We aim to bring the best possible news to the people. We want to make our articles different from the other articles and we will always ask people's opinion on the matter. The last thing we want to do is make the news boring. If you are confused about the seriousness of an article, then you can look for who wrote it. This has been a problem in the past. A serious eyewitness news article comes from the news desk while a lighthearted gag article such as ''Welcome to the rice fields'' does not. we hope you have a good time reading the articles and have a good day. -Bruce Dewitt, CEO place of operations Our HQ is located at 1217S Metropolitan avenue in Verdant Bluffs. Contact If you have a story that you think needs to be written about do call our help desk. If you have questions about the company or an employee you can also call the help desk. 757539 Email: [email protected] Employment We currently aren't hiring any staff, however if you feel that you have to be a part of the team, then you can call the help desk explaining why you need to be on the team. Terminated As of 17 November 2018 the company San Andreas Action News has been terminated by the CEO Bruce Dewitt who couldn't continue his work due to personal circumstances. You can still read the articles by clicking the links down below. We thank you for your continued support. Articles posted SAAN Part 2 The one thing that will never go away County Hall under fire Police Conference about tragedy ends in more tragedy Gang war brewing in Idlewood? Fistfight turns into bloodbath Get outa my way Faulty electrics almost turned a vehicle into ashes! She was never heard of again The great chicken heist of 2018 Explosive Pier Party! Accidents do happen outside of Idlewood Firecrackers can't melt car beams Idlewood chainsaw massacre Is parking dangerous? Not even Angel Pine is safe from gangs The iron lady It was just a prank Pervert at Howard's give away Can somebody please think of the children?! The election is over Antifa ruins everything Don Pinto egged by kids Dead bodies everywhere Fire, explosions and trailer parks Horrible crash leaves two dead Police kidnapped Los Santos releases battle royale mode Angel Pine goodness at Pizza Stack RS Haul, A Pole, and the county commissioner Happy Independence Day County Commissioner shot Internal battle in DPS finally over DPS falling apart Briefcase Throne Coincidence or Arson? Fire Chief position vacant Anti-Capitalists in Palomino Creek Crusade against business owners Slash and dash in Idlewood Fishing for bikes Where the police at? Loads of money for charity Torture in the middle of Los Santos San Tortuguilla restored and open for the people Reckless driver turns into Swiss Cheese Ganton is on fire, again The Hobo Thief The Hobo Thief's demise Panic at the pier Fire out of nowhere Suicide by cop Free car giveaway John Harlend saves Los Santos John Man ready to lead Los Santos Interview with county commissioner Nicholas Howard Anti rice protest Bombing in Los Santos Stop breaking into my properties Interview with LSFL Chairman James Bradford The final article
  4. Luigikuik

    San Andreas Action news

    We had a good run everyone. Special shout out to @FAILCAKEZ for being the number one fan and @DrJoseEviI for putting Bruce in Harlend Who from time to time. Also @JameZ for being the best lawyer and leaking DPS information. All the employees that worked with SAAN were also useful I guess. Now y'all can proceed to press F in the chat.
  5. Interview with county commissioner Nicholas Howard From the SAAN news desk For some time now the county government has been under fire by the public for questionable decisions. People are calling it fraud and urge the people involved to step down. There were rumors going around of Nicholas Howard resigning his position. Commissioner Howard has always been involved with the people of Los Santos in the form of public appearances and funding events. One of our reporter asked him for an interview and he happily accepted. Here below is the sound file of the interview. Want more SAAN? click here saan.news
  6. Luigikuik

    Newsletter - End of October 2018

    SAAN mentioned 10/10
  7. Luigikuik

    Departure - Croozerdog

    Rip my tax break
  8. Name: B.Dewitt Comment: 0:13 Illuminati confirmed
  9. Stop breaking into my properties From the SAAN news desk ''Hope they don't drink my milk.'', said our reporter to another bystander, waiting for the swat to arrest the burglars. Burglaries have been a real plague in Los Santos for some time now. You can't find a street where none of the houses have at least some signs of break ins. Vinewood, Marina, East LS, even large companies have to deal with people destroying their cameras and picking their locks. One of our reporter had his garage. On the second of November the robbers came back for more. Our reporter drove out of his garage when he noticed his front door closing. He was confused because he didn't expect anyone to visit. A minute later the police arrived on the scene and informed our reporter that burglars had indeed trigger the alarm. They urged the burglars to surrender and face the consequences. Instead of facing their decisions like men they barricaded themselves in the property. They were armed with semi-automatic weapons for some reason. Swat arrived on the scene and tried to get them out of the building. They tried to gas them out but the burglars had gas masks with them. The swat charged into the building with an armored car and a shootout occurred. The burglars fired at the swat and the swat fired back. The burglars somehow found the time to eat all the frozen chicken in the freezer before throwing milk bottles at the officers. After two and a half hours and more than 500 bullet holes later, the burglars got neutralized and only one of the swat was badly injured. The reason why the burglars took gas masks and semi-automatic weapons to a simple burglary is a mystery. Why they rather faced certain death than being trialed for breaking and entering is also unknown. Want more SAAN? click here. http://saan.news
  10. Luigikuik

    [SAAN] Bombing in Los Santos

    Bombing in Los Santos From the SAAN news desk ''What the fuck happened?!'', shouted a bystander after hearing gunshots and explosions. On the thirtieth of October our reporter stopped at a scene where officer Justin Stars was arresting a person. Since almost nothing has happened the past few days he decided to stick around. Suddenly two men dressed as Batman showed up and started shooting at officer Stars and the people near him. Two of the people near officer Stars were FBI agents and returned fire at the attackers. One of the batmen took out a grenade and threw it at officer Stars who was already shot a few times. The blast killed officer Stars and one of the attackers at the spot. Tnree bystanders got injured with one in a critical condition. The other police officers arrived in a record time and chased after one of the attackers that ran after the blast. He did not go very far before getting turned into Swiss Cheese. A lot of people were panicking and more and more officers showed up. Multiple ambulances arrived on the scene to help the wounded. The police car was completely destroyed by the grenade. Luckily with the police's quick reaction none of the attackers could get away. The motive of the attackers is unknown and some speculate that they were terrorists trying to take down police officers. Want more SAAN? click here saan.news
  11. Luigikuik

    ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

  12. Luigikuik

    [SAAN] Anti rice protest

    Anti rice protest From the SAAN news desk ''Ricers are donkeys, remember that.'', said a man actively trying to get rid people he saw as ricers. On the twenty-second of October our reporter almost got ran over by a man who was driving a box van. He parked his van right in front of the Pizza Stack building even though multiple people were standing there. He stated that he had to do a delivery, however the people were furious about almost being ran over. He left Stacks after a while to trap a modded car in the pay and spray with his van. He told our reporter that ricers hurt us and our kids, therefor someone had to stop the ricers. The man trapped inside the pay and spray demanded to be let go and the box van guy would release him if he payed ten dollars. A police officer showed up and resolved the issue for the moment by ordering the guy to move his box van, to which he did. Soon after the officer left he returned to the entrance of the pay and spray and stood there alone, once again blocking the entrance. A larger crowd now wanted him gone and tried to reason with him. He kept shouting that ricers had to go since they hurt people. The same officer returned and was now a bit frustrated. She gave the man one last warning to stop blocking the way for everyone or else he would be arrested. The man left the scene and returned when the police officer left. He now placed a chair in front of the entrance and sat down. The officer returned and was disappointed in the man that didn't learn his lesson. She arrested him and his chair was lynched by an angry mob. Want more saan? click here. saan.news
  13. Luigikuik

    [SAAN] Briefcase 6 is ready

    Name: B.Dewitt Comment:
  14. Luigikuik

    [SAAN] Briefcase 6 is ready

    Briefcase 6 is ready From the SAAN briefcase desk Well the special 20k worth briefcase had been found by someone right before I was going to post a second hint. The briefcase was located in Verona Mall since all the briefcases originate from there. Some people thought it was in Grove for some reason and someone asked me if it was behind the SAAN HQ since that would mean it was home for SAAN. Anyway the sixth briefcase has already been hidden by the special briefcase department of SAAN. The hint for this one is, eat fresh. Take a picture of you and the briefcase on the spot where you found it. Send it to [email protected] ((forum PM)). Get invited to the SAAN HQ to collect your 10 grand. Good luck everyone!
  15. Luigikuik

    [SAAN] Briefcase 5 found a new home

    Name: B.Dewitt Comment: The briefcase has been found. A new one will be placed next week. Good luck hunting next week.
  16. Briefcase 5 found a new home From the SAAN briefcase desk The fifth briefcase hasn't been found after almost a month of laying on top of the old Neptune in east LS. The briefcase has been moved to another location. This time Mister Stars from Stars Corporation has provided extra funds so that the prize money can increase from ten to twenty grand. Hopefully this spot isn't as hard as the last one. The same rules apply as always but this time you get more money from it. The hint is: Back home. Take a picture of you and the briefcase on the spot where you found it. Send it to [email protected] ((forum PM)). Get invited to the SAAN HQ to collect your 20 grand. Location of the old briefcase Extra sponsor for the briefcase hunt
  17. Luigikuik

    The meaning of "Ricer."

    Everyone that has a car that goes above 120 km/h is a ricer.
  18. Luigikuik

    [Youtube] Antimatter

    Name: B.Dewitt Comment: This is by far the best show that has ever been made. Especially the acting of that reporter was superb.
  19. Luigikuik

    Things only owlgaming oldfags will remember

    Akiyama-Kai falling apart because of esex
  20. John Man ready to lead Los Santos From the SAAN news desk ''Just say oh john mans running again'', said John Man to our reporter when he was asked what he was doing at Pizza Stack. On the twelfth of October the people at Pizza stack got blessed by the second coming of John Man. He announced to the world that he will be running for County Commissioner in the next elections. He has assembled a great staff already. He has the help of Huw Edwards, CEO of the largest company of Los Santos. Huw Edwards will be in charge of funding his campaign as he is the owner of Dinoco. John's legal advisor is Scott Murphy the old Chief of Police. And he hired a local from Idlewood to be his personal Chef. The name of this person is not important. From right to left: Scott Murphy, Huw Edwards, John Man and local fat man John Man ran for commissioner in the last election, but his name wasn't on the ballot. He was disappointed about this but is convinced that with the support of the people and the money from Huw he will win the next election. We from SAAN are happy to see the return of one of Los Santos most influential people to the lives of the people of stacks. Hopefully he will be on the ballot this time. Want more SAAN? click here. saan.news
  21. John Harlend saves Los Santos From the SAAN news desk ''Your dads got lego hands.'', was the insult the victim used to set the whole ordeal off. On the eleventh of October our reporter spotted the famous Time Horder John Harlend at Pizza Stack with his Nephew. One of the people at stacks told Harlend's Nephew that he was a nerd. The man got so angry that he headbutted the Pizza stack goer. The stack goer fought back by punching his attacker. The attacks went back and forth while bystanders tried to stop the fighting. The stacks goer pulled out his pistol and aimed it at his attacker. John got out his pistol before his nephew could be shot and aimed it at the man. He didn't lower his weapon so John opened fire and called the police. The police arrived and investigated the scene. The stacks goer was rushed to the hospital and he miraculously survived. John Harlend's nephew got arrested for evasion from the police not long after. John Harlend was kind enough to make time in his busy schedule of saving the planet to show our reporter his retardis. We from SAAN can't wait for the next episode. Want more SAAN? click here. saan.news
  22. Luigikuik

    [SAAN] Free car giveaway

    Free car giveaway From the SAAN car desk ''Mercedes-Benz is giving away a mystery AMG car at the DPS parking lot!'', was the advertisement that attracted people to come to parking lot next to the DPS HQ. On the seventh of October our reporter stumbled upon a car meet organised by Mercedes of San Andreas. They brought out their best cars and displayed them for all to see. They held a Mercedes quiz and the winner would get a Mercedes for free. More than the average crowd appeared to be interested and showed up for the Mercedes quiz. Our reporter didn't participate since he knows nothing about cars that aren't Ford Taures SHOs. After a few questions the winner emerged and got a Mercedes SL63 AMG sports car for free. The other participants were bummed out that they didn't get a free car and left once they were eliminated from the competition. The winner himself wanted his face blurred from the shot for unspecified reasons. Maybe next time Mercedes of San Andreas will host a barbecue. Want more SAAN? Click here. saan.news
  23. Luigikuik

    [SAAN] Free car giveaway

    Name: B.Dewitt Comment: Correct.
  24. Luigikuik

    [SAAN] Suicide by cop

    Suicide by cop From the SAAN news desk ''No priors from our side, no idea why he did it.'', told a police sergeant to our reporter when he was talking about the reason the suspect was killed. On the sixth of October an police officer ordered a motorcyclist to stop and park on the side of the road when the motorcyclist violated one of the traffic laws. The motorcyclist had other plans however. He raced away from the police officer and the officer called in back up to chase him. The cyclist was driving recklessly through the city with the police on his heels. He lost his grip in a corner on Pasadena Boulevard and fell off his motorcycle. Three units aimed their guns at the suspect and he complied to their orders. He then decided to get up from the ground and take a handgun from his waistline and fired on the officers. One of them got hit on his upper body, luckily saved by his vest. The other officers opened fire on the suspect killing him. The motive of the suspect why he opened fire on the officers is unknown. One of the officers thought that it might be a suicide by cop. Want more SAAN? click here saan.news
  25. Can't wait for the story where you pay me back my money. 👍

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